Saying what’s on our mind isn’t always a good thing… or is it? As a child my grandmother told me, “If you have nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.” From that moment on, I spent the majority of my life living by those words. Afraid to hurt someone’s feelings, cautious not to say too much, and constantly walking on eggshells in fear of hurting someone’s feelings. Biting my tongue and having this filter became constant work. It’s not that I am an asshole who has to hold back from lashing out. I just found myself becoming more and more repressed. Spending more time trying to find the perfect words to express myself and less time saying what I truly felt.

The truth is, I absolutely love being horribly straightforward. I love saying exactly what I’m thinking, sending reckless or overly complex text messages, saying what others are too afraid to speak into existence, asking too many questions, falling for every human I meet, and standing up for something or someone when no one else will. And the words that come out to get those points across aren’t always ‘nice’.
There’s something about speaking taboo words and going against the grain that feels so liberating and ignites the fire inside me. I want to speak about the depths inside me and to draw those feelings out in others.

I love people. The right kind of people posses this magic and I want to tell them. And I do. I love empowering others – letting them know how special they are and what they mean to me and this world. I love to say the little things that carry a large impact. I like to tell people when they’ve brightened my day. Because one day – I won’t be here and one day they won’t either. I get it, those are all very nice things. But I also want to reveal the ugly, the fears, and truths. And regrettably, the truth can be the nastiest of them all. Maybe I am too much for many. Maybe it scares the shit out of people. Maybe it seems too impossible for some people just to be, to express, in that very moment. It’s time you let people know you want them – don’t back down from revealing or vocalizing the truth. Let someone know you need them – it’s okay to need people. If you want to be touched, ask. Ask where you want to be touched whether it’s your heart, your hand, or between your thighs. There is nothing more beautiful than being authentically who you are and unapologetic. There is nothing riskier than faking how you really feel. You risk your happiness. We never know the magic that can arise between ourselves and our connections with other humans unless we are ready to be unapologetic.

What I’ve come to learn is, sometimes what we feel isn’t always nice. There are times (especially now) where we have to stand up against an injustice and there’s just no room left to be sheepish. There are times we have to take a stand for ourselves and for other people. There will be times when you’ll have nothing nice left to say, and that’s when you’ll need to say the most. Say it. Be intimate. Be too much. Be bold. As long as you are not maliciously hurting another human being or imposing on basic human rights, then stand up for yourself, for others, and for your beliefs.



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